Watch Out, Beagle’s About

In 2002, my sister Joanne and her new husband, Dean, moved into their first house together after falling hard and fast in love and they knew that they wanted to fit as many experiences as possible into their marriage. You see the difference with these two was that Dean had Cystic Fibrosis so every year, every day and every second counted. Having children was going to be a very complicated process so in the meantime they decided to get a dog.

Enter Vinnie (named after Dean’s favourite footballer Vinnie Jones) who was about to become Dean’s best friend, Joanne’s first ‘child’ and my nemesis. Dean took him out every morning before work, introduced him to the biggest baddest dogs in the neighbourhood and they formed a bond which was never broken. Like Dean he was an Alpha. Unafraid of anything, stubborn, funny, greedy, naughty and clever. And very handsome with it too. They were two peas in a pod. Joanne’s maternal instinct kicked in and she adored him, giving him the best of everything, food, toys, bedding and worrying how long they left him whilst they worked during the day. Which is when I stepped up as sister extraordinaire!

I worked close to their house and got an hour for my dinner so the task of spending it with the new puppy wasn’t exactly a bind. Or so I thought.

This cute little Beagle puppy ran rings around me! I used to nip him out for a quick wee, give him a treat whilst I had my dinner and then I had to put him back in their cellar kitchen behind a gate so he couldn’t hurt himself on the stone steps or poo all over their new sofa. But Vinnie really didn’t want to go back to the kitchen because he wanted the whole house to himself. It was his house and he was going to damn well have it! Being a proper little smart-arse he quickly learnt to ignore my temptations of dog treats, cajoling, ignoring and then just shouting and he legged it around the whole house with me chasing him. I often had a taxi waiting to take me back to work and more than once it got fed up of waiting for the mad woman who ran past the window ten thousand times, and just left without me. How I didn’t get sacked I do not know. Dean and Joanne found it hilarious!

After two years or so Dean started with some symptoms that his doctor confirmed was due to an allergy to animal dander (the skin and microscopic flecks off animals – no I’d never heard of it either) and they were both gutted. It was a choice of their adored boy Vinnie, or Dean’s health and even though they both contemplated keeping the dog anyway (they really loved him!) they knew that they had to give him up. Our Mum and Dad had recently moved into a big house in the countryside and had built an outdoor heated kennel for their own dogs, Petra and Charlie, as well as an indoor wash house space with heated floors. Vinnie was about to enter the lap of luxury and off he went without a care in the world. The other dogs Petra and Charlie already knew him well and happily let him move in and play at being king of the castle. They both watched his antics from afar whilst he spent most of his time trying to get himself into trouble. Here are just a few examples of what he got up to…

Dad once found him asleep on top of his pristine soft top classic Jaguar having used the bonnet to scramble up there. Oops.

When they were having, some work done at the house the builders left the van door open and Vinnie was found, just as he’d polished off the last of their butties – tinfoil and all. Oh dear.

Mum once chased him round and round the garden because he had caught a baby rabbit and just as she cornered him and was about to save it, he swallowed it in one. Jeez!

Joanne and Dean used to take him for days out which they all loved and even in the presence of his beloved Dean he once stopped traffic on the high street because he had slipped the lead and was playing ‘catch me if you can’ having a whale of a time whilst cars honked and swerved around him. Embarrassing!

And at the local agricultural show Joanne didn’t notice the toddler who had just been given a hot dog. Vinnie did though. The hot dog was gone in one gulp. The shame!

After both Petra and Charlie died, Mum and Dad wanted to retire and enjoy some freedom so that’s how at the age of 9 Vinnie came to live with me and happily for him my next-door neighbours were…. Joanne and Dean! They were all thrilled.

I, however, was apprehensive because I already had my retriever Bongo who wasn’t a big fan of other dogs or of sharing the attention of me and my husband, Tony. Of course, his notoriety followed him around too. Soon though, Bongo seemed to find his personality a comfort when they were out together as a lot of her anxieties got a bit better. She wasn’t as scared of everything anymore. He gave her confidence. She never did get over her jealousy though and if I was stroking Vinnie she used to come up and barge him out of the way. He didn’t mind though he really did seem to understand her.

And this is when something odd happened. This crazy Beagle that drove us to distraction by digging up our garden, barking at 100,000 decibels for his breakfast at 5am, running off whenever the chance came, eating the rotting corpses of frogs, making me retch in the middle of a field and once, as I was admiring a beautiful blue butterfly dancing across the grass, launched himself up and ate it. You’ll never guess what happened? We fell in love!

Finally, I understood what my sister and Dean had always known. He was just the best.

His charm was legendary. I love hugging dogs and at first he wasn’t too bothered but as he got older he succumbed to my pestering and we ended up snuggling together most nights. Vinnie on one side, Bongo on the other. My husband on the other settee. Sorry Tony. He was ridiculously funny and full of personality too. And his intelligence and blasé attitude combined was amazing.

For example, my sister who had by now had her second child with Dean (fortunately he wasn’t allergic to babies) was nursing her baby boy at 3am whilst looking out of the front window of her house (next door to mine). Suddenly she spotted a short stocky shape trundling down the pavement along the main road. Could it be a badger? As she watched, it turned into our driveway and went to our front door and she saw that it was a very nonchalant Vinnie. How on earth had he got out? All we can think is that he pushed open the connecting gate in our back gardens, climbed onto a bench and launched himself over Joanne’s wall even though it is a 5-foot drop. Then he crossed the back field to the park and managed to get onto the main road and find his way home again. He could have been gone for hours so god only knows what he got up to on his travels. Sorry to anyone in our town who may, in the summer of 2012 have woken one morning to see their garden dug up, their bins ransacked or their butterfly collection eaten.

We had Vinnie for 6 years in the end until at age 15 the fatty lumps that covered his body suddenly spread to his neck and began to restrict his breathing. He was constantly coughing and could barely walk without stopping for a big old coughing fit. Dean joked he was more like him than any of us already thought. We made the decision as a family to have him put to sleep and when the vet arrived at our home, off Vinnie went to say hello, tail wagging like the charmer he had always been. Even the battle hardy vet fell for him.

He’d lived with my whole family at one time or another and drove us all mad but we knew, and more importantly he knew that he was truly loved. He never forgot who his ‘parents’ were though. His OG’s. His home. Joanne and Dean.

I’ll never forget Dean’s last words to him “see you on the other side mate”.

Two years later Dean died after a 46-year battle with Cystic Fibrosis but with a wonderful life lived, surrounded with love, an amazing marriage, two beautiful children and of course, his best mate Vinnie.

See you on the other side you guys.